Guess who’s back, back again, shady’s back. No, don’t worry – I am not getting all Phil Hellmuth on you all – I have no desire to wear an ipod and sunglasses in a nightclub and waffle a load of Jay-Z/Eminem street talk.

Tony G is back and in the week they say they are making progress towards finding the higgs boson and making history with physics I am back with a very big bang!

Full of heart of commitment, and fresh from breaks in Nida and Palanga, I headed for Cardiff yesterday to play in the Poker Lounge – a $20,000 six-seater sit-and -go for television. I took it down for the $120k winner takes all first prize.

In my way was Mike ‘The Mouth’ Matusow, who like a greedy pacman was hungry to eat me alive. Also in the line-up was a very, very grumpy Jennifer Harman, who threw a fit in the taxi on the way to the studios as she hates mornings. It hardly made for a comfortable ride but I did have the pleasure of releasing her back to London to join her husband in Italy when I flushed her out the door.

Jesus was also in the house in the form of Chris Ferguson – he didn’t walk on water and even struggled to ride the bike due to the big waves from the G that were crashing around his feet. Brit James Dempsey was also in my heat – here’s a man with some serious form after recently winning a bracelet and taking down a second at the WSOP. Even he was no match for the rejuvenated G force. I was the captain, I owned them all at the table.

In fairness, I simply cruised it – I smashed up the Poker Lounge. I ended up heads-up with Mike the Mouth with a thin chip lead but I was too classy and a repeat of the famous WPT Bad Boys of Poker finale was set. I crushed Matusow then and I crushed him again but this time I wore no kimono!

Trapped Mike with a cool call on my big blind

In the final hand I trapped Mike with a cool call on my big blind when he raised on the button. I was holding A9 and he had A5. Once the ace was released on the flop Mike was confused and happy to ship the stack to the G. On ya bike! I picked up $120k that will keep me off the streets for a week or so as London is costly and there are crocodiles on the streets. Luckily Tony G is the Lounge Lizard!

I do think taking a break from playing means the return of my A game, or I should I say my G game! I have been watching developments In Vegas with a keen eye. I am sorry to have missed the WPT Bellagio Cup – Ivey was very close to making history after coming third after buying in after the 11th level. Complete madness!

I also had to chuckle when I saw the video of Hellmuth trying to make the latest entry into a poker tournament in history. The way that Durrrr just casually walks up to the cage at the Bellagio when the Poker Brat was surrounded by cameras and the WPT’s Royal Flush girls is classic…

Talking of the introduction of the Royal Flush Girls by the WPT – it seemed like a good idea to me. Like the beauty queens – here are some ladies in desperate need of the guiding hand of Tony G! On a more serious note, I was also happy to see the WPT appoint Matt Savage as Tour Director – an excellent move in my eyes.

I have been listening to Jesse May on the Poker Show and was amused when Hellmuth started talking about the letter I wrote to him after his melt down at Bay 101. He said I could throw mud at him continuously but he always brushed it off as I had big heart. That is true but don’t underestimate the menace of the lounge lizard Phil!

Russian parasailing donkey

I am now back in London getting ready for my Poker Milion heat on the 29th. I am also going to be playing the WPT London at the end of August.

The front page of the Sun newspaper today is all about a Russian parasailing donkey. I deplore the animal cruelty of these Russians but at the same time I got a phone call from one of Russian poker’s finest in the form of Alex Kravchenko.

Alex the Russian parasailing donkey is going to be joining me at WPT London – what would a Russian bike riding parasailing donkey look like? He’s going to find out! Bring it on! Come and join me by qualifying online at PartyPoker.com now.

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