As a Vegas veteran and a representative of the poker community I think it is time for me to offer some advice to the UK’s Prince Harry after his night of XS in Sin City.

Play a man’s game!

Stop playing ball games your royal highness, play a man’s game – get on the poker table and I will strip you of your wallet. Get the nuts and lose your crown jewels to me! In poker, one common aim is to not reveal that you have got the nuts when you have. You don’t need to show them to everybody!

In all seriousness Harry you should watch out for all those girls in Vegas clubs who try so hard to be your friend. Been there, done that. I have had friends that have met girls in Vegas, fallen in love and found out the hard way that their motives are not all heart. If you want to find a wife follow my guiding hand and come and raid my house and I will find you a princess.

I cannot say it enough but you have to remember who your friends are. You were hanging out with swmming ace Ryan Lochte at the club and he will tell you the same. I know that Michael Phelps has similar problems to Lochte with hangers on. It’s got to such an extreme level with him these people even stalk him around the world tweeting about it at every moment they possibly can.

Dropped their balls

It is clear that your people dropped their balls when the girls phones weren’t taken away when they came back to your room. Next time we do not want an encore – when you go to Vegas ask for one of Steve Wynn’s private villas instead – when I was there I lived next door to his fearsome German Shepherd who can spot people that are clearly not qualified. I’ll even lend you my security team if you want.

Don’t Change!

Most of all Harry don’t change and good on you but do be careful – it is best to get naked in the sauna. I know most of the upper echelons of the poker community will be studying the pictures of the club and your room saying that the facilities and treatment they get when they are there are much better. Come to the Tony G house, you can have everything there.


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