Hellmuth - someone get me the limo

Currently in London , heading to Monte Carlo late Sunday night. I am in a good frame of mind, bit p*ssed that there will not be any internet on the flight to Monaco but hey, you take the rough with the smooth. Before that I am playing in an online tournament organised by www.ecolefrancaisedepoker.fr. They call it Fight Club, I am going to fight HARD! By the way, I am ready for the PartyPoker.com Facebook freeroll in May – I see all you haters, I am going to destroy you.

The volcano meant I was unable to attend the WPT Championship at the Bellagio but I have been following the news like a hawk. Yes, Tony G the lion is now a bird of prey ready to swoop down on unsuspecting fresh fish!

I cannot believe it, Phil Hellmuth bubbled the televised final table. What’s going on buddy?

Dear Phil,

I wrote to you after your WPT Bay 101 bust out as I was worried about the disturbing image I saw of you. Then I see what happened at the WPT Championship! What is going on man? You bubbled the televised final table! So near, yet so far! If you had gone on to win you would have been tied with Faraz for player of the year – I would have made you two arm wrestle for the title!

Some people thought I was being insincere when I said before that I was worried about you and I hope that this latest set back doesn’t put you on massive tilt but I do have a few things to get off of my chest.

Listen mate, you are gone, gone, gone! I own you, I am the captain…so near yet so far – get rid of the stupid mindset coach and let Tony G put some PEMM (Positive, Exercise, Meditation, Moment) in your life. Let me pull you apart and tear you into little pieces, rip your head off – pull the ipod out of your ears and throw the cap and sunglasses in the fire. Burn baby burn. I do this not out of hate though – I do this as part of the reinvention of Phil Hellmuth.

Sorry, I got a bit caught up with myself then. I love you man – though I am still a lion – a massive jungle cat and I am going to eat you. Before that I will cuddle you though so be good – get rid of mindset coach Sam and employ Tony G! I can teach you all about heart. You have the commitment to the game and are on the verge of a massive comeback! You fell a little short at the Bellagio, all the internet kids on trikes are catching you up or have overtaken you. Don’t worry Tony G is here to help!

Once you have your mojo back we’ll have your face back on beer cans in no time.

Love

Tony x

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3 Comments

  1. Pingback: Tony G jatkaa Hellmuthin piikittelyä ja haluaa Philin mentaalivalmentajaksi | Pokerista

  2. Hi man, Ready for Fight tonight in the Fight Club?
    At least, we will know who is really the Captain, right? And be carefull, dont touche my blinds ! ;)
    See you soon
    Phil “filouzof” Latour

  3. Yeah i don,t think anyone can fix this guy now he,s lost it mentally and can,t play outside the box which you need to be able to do if you are to be a top player these days.Sick of hearing him going on about how players are idiots and are making bad calls as they put him out of tourneys onto his ass.Hope he gets bad beats until he quit,s poker,poker wont miss him and poker don,t need him.